'Green dream needs full government support'

Says the Campaign for the Protection of Rural England of which I am a member although maybe not for much longer. They may go the way of Christian Aid in being crossed off my charity list. The faintest hint of hypocritical greenfaking, let alone a whiff of watermelon, tends to alienate my support faster than the advocacy of eating children.

On its website and in its recent mailer, there is much fulmination from the CPRE about the despoiling of the most beautiful areas of the countryside by pylons - these things:

 

... and there is praise for Huhne's undertaking to look at the possibility of much smaller ones, like those in Denmark (apparently). Good old green-economy Huhne, eh? Sound fellah, what? Last thing old Chris wants is to set up bloody ggreat monsters all over our hills and valleys. What? Whaddya saying there? Wind turbines? Eh?

The CPRE is also much exercised about the proliferation in the greener and more pleasant districts of, er, this sort of nonsense:

The Chancellor seems to be opening the way for a planning free-for-all at any cost

Tsk. How could he? And as for this sort of thing (insert snort here):



... well, really. I mean. I ask you.

Hands off our green fields, Mr Cameron! Or we'll... we'll... yes, well. Just watch it, that's all.

But wait - there is more praise:

The government is showing some sensitivity about the siting of wind turbines.    

Oh, jolly good show! It'll be that chap Huhne again. Sound fellah. But look, wind turbines simply aren't as ugly as pylons, are they, so let's not make too much fuss about them. They are the future, after all. Well, all the farmers and landowners round here see them as their future, anyhow. Small fortunes to be made if only you can see off the damned protesters. Ain't that right, St John? More ice in that, Charles? Well, here's to England's green and pleasant land, eh? Mud in yer eyes, chaps!